If you ever find yourself in Madrid, working next to a place that sells TWO CROISSANTS FOR ONE EURO (not like they're the best croissants ever, but they're not bad and they're big and you get two of them for just one euro) obviously you'll buy them. You're not stupid. You can only eat one at work (you're only there for two hours) and you don't need to seem like a fat American.
So you eat the other one on the metro, right? WRONG. Do not eat your second croissant on the metro.
1) People just don't eat food outside of the house/restaurants here. Eating is not for the street. Starbucks is trying to get people to take coffee to go and, thank god, it's not working.
2) Madrileños are rubberneckers. They have no shame in staring at the strange thing that is happening to by them. They love watching fights. There was a dog on the metro today and you'd have thought it was a parade. The metro is also boring, that might have something to do with it.
3) Croissants are really crumbly.
Next thing you know, you'll have crumbs all over yourself and all 20 people in the Metro staring at you, judging you.
Wait until you get home, grasshoppers.
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